The hum of the engine, the subtle roar of the tires on the ribbon of asphalt so close beneath me, the warmth of the heater, curled in bliss in the unspeakable dark, my parents’ near and murmuring voices above me… the quieting, winding down of the engine, jostled as we were turning at last onto... Continue Reading →
Joining Satan’s legions as His soldier
August 28, 2022 My working with Sathanas tonight was very profound, historic for me. I bowed to him for a long time. I offered myself to him, asking him to let me serve him in all things. How wonderful it feels to be authentic and real with him! The fruits of my recent work, hard... Continue Reading →
Late August transformation with the Magus
22 August, after our online meeting Seeing myself through the Magus’ eyes… I see that I have an agenda, which is by nature limiting. It is the same, familiar one. The fix. The thing that will make me feel alive, connected to the thrilling process of life. This is based on feeling empty, disconnected, broken.... Continue Reading →
Working with Belial
August 28, 2022 I am so far behind on my grimoire. I will record a few important things as I remember them, but first, regarding my ritual work tonight. I planned to work with Sathanas, but was impressed to work with Belial. He came to me with a heavy possession of bliss, my body fluid... Continue Reading →
The Tantric Process of Purification in the Kashmir Shaivism School of Hinduism
Before the beginning of my Satanic burning (shadow work), I underwent twenty years of burning through direct work with Shree Kundalini, also known as Shakti, the active form of Shiva. Any spiritual process of purification referred to as burning has a source of heat. In my conception of work with Shree Kundalini, the heat of... Continue Reading →
Three nights with Lord Sathanas
I have performed three evening rituals over the last three days without recording them in my grimoire (which is part of this blog). I need to catch up. All three have been similar in that at a certain point in the ritual, after I feel the bliss of trance and internal energy work of possession... Continue Reading →
Remaining committed in each moment to Him
I dreamed that a tooth was loose, very loose. It was in the front, on the bottom. Finally I lifted it out. It wasn't connected. Then something happened and I forgot I was holding it, and found I had dropped it. I could not find it. I looked at my teeth in a mirror. They... Continue Reading →
My tender ritual for my Beloved, the Egyptian god Set
A tender ritual for my beloved Set, husband to consort-goddess Astarte, my namesake Adapted from 'Necrominon: Egyptian Sethanic Magick,' by Michael W. Ford Words in all caps are vibrated (intoned with a long depth of strong voice) Athame facing South (towards the Egyptian desert) Divine Seth, heir of eternity I invoke you by your secret... Continue Reading →
My first ritual with the Coven: The Black Mass
A day I have prepared for, perhaps all of my life. How I have longed to experience magic in a group setting. And the morning has come for the day of my first group ritual, the first ritual with the Coven I am being initiated into. The usual nicotine rush from my first hit of... Continue Reading →
Consecrated by His fire
I felt the impression to go to the cemetery, I go there sometimes to sit on a bench under a tree, where the veil between worlds is thinner. I make an offering to the spirits there, a little candle lit and some incense waived. While I was there, I saw a dark shape run across... Continue Reading →
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