A record of my ascent as a theistic Satanist and black magician by Astarte Astaroth
Eric reads my question: Astarte Astaroth says: "I feel the Nine Demonic Gatekeepers each grasping my spine in a row. I felt this yesterday. You know that I don't really do ceremonial magic at this point. Do you have advice on how I might informally work with their presence?" Great question, Astarte. If you feel... Continue Reading →
I am intoxicated. I am surrounded by spirit, by soul. Consciousness is the elixir... my mind the container, the emanator, the emanated. Each moment of attachment is a familiar cliff I throw myself off at last, gently... gently... sailing away into all that is unknown, and free. I have pivoted away from the life I... Continue Reading →
"Expectation is a prison." ~ Robert Fripp It just would not do. It is and would be a trap, a trap that would become eternal if I set out on my eternal path from that place. I am standing here. I stand here, still at the very place where I found my Lord, my allies,... Continue Reading →
Yesterday I was touched twice. My experience has been that physical touches are always Satan. One unmistakable touch was upon my third-eye area, with a very small downward movement, similar to receiving shaktipat, which I received in 1999. The other sometime later yesterday was a sudden grasp of my right foot, around the toes, followed... Continue Reading →
It is happening. It has taken most of the month of January. To stop. To stop being driven. I spent a year building and maturing my business. I've done quite well. And I have been obsessed, an obsession that lasted every day for most of the day. Since November 2021. I was instructed. To stop.... Continue Reading →
Lord have mercy, Satan have mercy I am the fatherless, orphaned by violenceFather Satan, have mercy on meA wild child, ungainly... persecuted by idiotsFather give me to myselfHeal me with thy loveFather don't leave meAn orphan made, by assault and assassinI left without leavingI covered my soul in darknessI tread upon the bloody field of... Continue Reading →
I've always been a wild child. I was orphaned by my parents while still living with them (yes, this is possible). Summer days meant riding my bike through the wild fields that surrounded our small subdivision, leading the charge with the other children in my neighborhood. There were tadpoles and frogs, leeches and dragonflies in... Continue Reading →
Over and over, I have asked the entities to appear to me visible in a corporeal form, rather than always visiting me in their astral form. They can see me. Why can't I get to see them, at least once? Today Nergal from Behemoth possessed me and we had astral sex. I knew instantly it... Continue Reading →
Look around. Everything you see is the pretty paper that hides the most precious gift. Everything you see is the movie playing on a screen. What is beyond the screen? I know you think this is a tired old analogy. This is not a theory, dear readers. I am not telling you something I came... Continue Reading →
Illustration from E.A. Koetting live stream interview with Martin McGreggor: odysee.com/@EAKoetting/ea-martin-interview The Self-Deification spellwork is available on BALG here: becomealivinggod.com/deificationmagick I haven't read The Deification Spellbook, or taken the course. However, some of the themes and stages explored in this summary for Martin McGreggor's contributions to the book describe the changes that have been happening... Continue Reading →
Twilight in the Underworld 
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