A record of my ascent as a theistic Satanist and black magician by Astarte Astaroth
I have been looking back at my life for a couple of days now. I have looked at the long arc of suffering that finally ended when I landed in this, my own sweet apartment six years ago, having finally achieved financial independence from my (alcoholic) husband. I looked at all the suffering, the whole... Continue Reading →
—Image from Duran Duran 'Come Undone" official video— I throw my arms wide and offer myself to the divine ones who are changing me. Take this neediness, this fear, this constant perfectionism with accompanying searing pain of regret. If this is dissolved, I will become something new, something free, something I cannot imagine. Once I... Continue Reading →
—Banner image from video by Behemoth-X, thank you Mr. Nunn— I was watching a video with a ritual and mantra to Satan. I started to type an email to Mr. Nunn, asking if he would share with me the words of the mantra. I only made it a little way into the email. Suddenly I... Continue Reading →
August 28, 2022 I am so far behind on my grimoire. I will record a few important things as I remember them, but first, regarding my ritual work tonight. I planned to work with Sathanas, but was impressed to work with Belial. He came to me with a heavy possession of bliss, my body fluid... Continue Reading →
—Estella Canziani 'Satan Awakening His Legions' (1913)— CHRISTIAN TOURISTS Christian tourists are not welcome here. Go get titillated somewhere else. Please leave and take your false god with you. Thank you. I am making a momentous decision, to join the coven of theistic Satanists that I have been working with. To decide to whether I... Continue Reading →
Lord Sathanas has touched me before during rituals with him. Once he touched my temple right next to my eye, and I realized later this changed my sight somehow. Today in my ritual, after I was done with opening mantras and offered praise and devotion, my body possessed leaned forward until I was bowing, bowing... Continue Reading →
Hi E____, I'll bet you know immediately what I am talking about if I say that as someone raised Mormon, I am plagued by doubt. Self-questioning and examination. Re-examination. Endless...! Am I fooling myself? Has the devil's deception begun to take root in my day to day life? In the very things I care most... Continue Reading →
Last night. I felt the place of trance opening as I lit the candles, waved the incense, offered drops of my blood to the sigils of Azazel and Belial. I smeared my blood on a slip of paper and burned it in my brazier, offering my life's essence to Death. I said some magical phrases.... Continue Reading →
Hi E___... I had a huge insight. As you know, I experienced a full awakening of my kundalini by a Hindu master at the beginning of 2000, and lived in an ashram for three years. From that time until discovering the Occult a year ago, I experienced intense kundalini and meditation work that has burned... Continue Reading →
Working with Belial again. It has been several months since he "passed me on" to work with Set. I started by calling him to my temple, but he did not come. I said "I'm afraid," and I felt him comforting me. I began to settle down, eventually into a trance. I saw him with his... Continue Reading →
Twilight in the Underworld 
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