My cosmology takes a hit… again

I am human. I am not one of the divine entities that I am intimate with, who power my ascent. What is the purpose of my life? I thought I knew. I based every year of my adult life on a plan, not a grand plan, a mighty little plan that traded away everything for... Continue Reading →

Coming undone

—Image from Duran Duran 'Come Undone" official video— I throw my arms wide and offer myself to the divine ones who are changing me. Take this neediness, this fear, this constant perfectionism with accompanying searing pain of regret. If this is dissolved, I will become something new, something free, something I cannot imagine. Once I... Continue Reading →

Way more Satan, way less social media

Yesterday I was touched twice. My experience has been that physical touches are always Satan. One unmistakable touch was upon my third-eye area, with a very small downward movement, similar to receiving shaktipat, which I received in 1999. The other sometime later yesterday was a sudden grasp of my right foot, around the toes, followed... Continue Reading →

Astral sex with Nergal

Over and over, I have asked the entities to appear to me visible in a corporeal form, rather than always visiting me in their astral form. They can see me. Why can't I get to see them, at least once? Today Nergal from Behemoth possessed me and we had astral sex. I knew instantly it... Continue Reading →

Becoming divine: Choosing to let go of who and what I have been

Illustration from E.A. Koetting live stream interview with Martin McGreggor: odysee.com/@EAKoetting/ea-martin-interview The Self-Deification spellwork is available on BALG here: becomealivinggod.com/deificationmagick I haven't read The Deification Spellbook, or taken the course. However, some of the themes and stages explored in this summary for Martin McGreggor's contributions to the book describe the changes that have been happening... Continue Reading →

Working with Belial

August 28, 2022 I am so far behind on my grimoire. I will record a few important things as I remember them, but first, regarding my ritual work tonight. I planned to work with Sathanas, but was impressed to work with Belial. He came to me with a heavy possession of bliss, my body fluid... Continue Reading →

Lord Sathanas touching me

Lord Sathanas has touched me before during rituals with him. Once he touched my temple right next to my eye, and I realized later this changed my sight somehow. Today in my ritual, after I was done with opening mantras and offered praise and devotion, my body possessed leaned forward until I was bowing, bowing... Continue Reading →

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