A record of my ascent by Astarte Astaroth
I went for it. I booked a half-hour consultation with Eric ________. I had to charge the cost to credit. I woke up this morning not knowing if he would be put off by my desire to connect, or what shape our connection would take. This is a famous person, a leader amongst the magical... Continue Reading →
So tender, so sweet. You kissed me again after... this time for minutes of softness, this gentle tasting of shared moisture. So tender, so sweet. Again you brought a tear to my eye, more than a tear, more than the one that fell upon my cheek. Everything you do with me has a greater purpose.... Continue Reading →
New understanding. I connect to the currents of other magicians I know and relate to. I am not 'over here' reading their book, thinking of them 'over there.' We are connected energetically. It is a spontaneous and real linking that I can recognize, nurture and depend on. I am currently connected to the personal currents... Continue Reading →
First a reminder, dear reader. Demon pleasuring occurs in the subtle realm. I can feel Azazel physically and subtly as energy. I feel his fiery touch upon me, his body upon mine, his presence inside of me as intense and fiery pleasure. I usually cannot see him. In this realm of astral sex, my subtle... Continue Reading →
I have entered a stage where I am so tired, and so achy, I feel like I am dying. It is like the tired and achy parts of a very bad flu. I never get sick, so it has been many many years since I have had a cold or the flu. I think I... Continue Reading →
I can frame it thus: it is not enough. It is not enough to know my true nature: a being much greater than this. It is not enough to know the true nature of this, the universe: truly the multiverse. It is not enough to know that I will not reach a full attainment... this,... Continue Reading →
—Art by Merlin Lightpainting on Pixabay— I do not evolve alone. Entities touch me, fill me, withdraw from me, return. In each way they teach me. They teach me what to pay attention to. They teach me what is extraneous noise. They teach me to let go of what I think it means, their interactions... Continue Reading →
—Cover art from The Instant by Amy Liptrot— I am not trying to get anywhere. I have arrived. I surf the moments, the river of experience, of transformation and ascent. Only someone who could understand me... if I said I had been waiting all of my life for my life to begin... can understand what... Continue Reading →
I was half-awake, half-asleep. Lying in bed. I felt subtle energy shifts in my body, ones I had never experienced before. And part of me was being transformed. I felt myself being energetically rearranged. In various ways, over several minutes of a gentle inner focus. When I got up, and was having my coffee, I... Continue Reading →
—'Autopsy' by Enrique Simonet— I cannot be truly powerful unless I am integrated. Integrated means grasping the whole of what I am. When I am involved in addictive behaviors, I am trying to get something from a substance or activity. This pursuit is mentally and physically obsessive. Obsession is the opposite of integration. I have... Continue Reading →
Twilight in the Underworld 
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