A record of my ascent as a theistic Satanist and black magician by Astarte Astaroth
I am intoxicated. I am surrounded by spirit, by soul. Consciousness is the elixir... my mind the container, the emanator, the emanated. Each moment of attachment is a familiar cliff I throw myself off at last, gently... gently... sailing away into all that is unknown, and free. I have pivoted away from the life I... Continue Reading →
Lord have mercy, Satan have mercy I am the fatherless, orphaned by violenceFather Satan, have mercy on meA wild child, ungainly... persecuted by idiotsFather give me to myselfHeal me with thy loveFather don't leave meAn orphan made, by assault and assassinI left without leavingI covered my soul in darknessI tread upon the bloody field of... Continue Reading →
—This page on my blog has several graphics to load.... patience, dear reader— Father, I love you. Is it enough for me to love you forever? Forever have you loved me, your creation. Forever will you make me greater, yours. Yours forever. Father Satan, I find you always so close. Closer than close, deep within... Continue Reading →
17 October I have been divided by Lord Satan. There is no room left inside of me where the limited and the unlimited of my ascent can touch and overlap. It is PAINFUL as the one I have been dies. It is PAINFUL, this still-birth of the one I thought I was, the dark and... Continue Reading →
Set has been calling to me. I see the Crimson Desert in my mind, then walk amongst the immense, colorful columns crowned with stylized lotus and papyrus blossoms, following the whisps of smoke trailing upon the incense perfumed air. I find myself in the soaring temple of a past life... loving you, worshiping you. The... Continue Reading →
The hum of the engine, the subtle roar of the tires on the ribbon of asphalt so close beneath me, the warmth of the heater, curled in bliss in the unspeakable dark, my parents’ near and murmuring voices above me… the quieting, winding down of the engine, jostled as we were turning at last onto... Continue Reading →
Not everything worth writing (blogging) about is glamorous. Fun. Exciting. Some of it is shit. Ugly. Embarrassing. I have an arrangement with myself that is OLD and IN THE WAY. I only do things when I feel like it. This gives me a tiny glimmer of freedom. A way of staying out of the real... Continue Reading →
I have an idea for a book. I have been wanting to write a book about the occult, an occult book for the practitioner of the dark arts, of magic. I have an idea! And... I think the book is about an energy that will "write the book itself." Because it is intelligent energy, energy... Continue Reading →
The cock has crowed; I renounce thrice All that might enslave me Blind obedience Guilt and shame Fear and doubt I renounce fear and doubt I pivot on this inner point of old despair to embrace what is shining and now my developing intellect my growing power my unflinching progress There will be no weeping... Continue Reading →
You are that which I turn to in myself my Beloved That part of me that also consists of you... All of me That which quickens in me I carry you, but I am the child You grow inside of me, as me I feel the torrent of you, close like the bloodstream droning sounds... Continue Reading →
Twilight in the Underworld 
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