A DARK story about Mordor: How I found myself through the Occult

Aragorn submits to Sauron, who changes him with evil. Will Aragorn make it back to the overworld?

Picture Mordor. The place of unspeakable horror that is Mordor. The enduring evil that is Sauron. Sauron’s dark tower, where the hissing steam from Mt. Doom fills his nights with scorched and sulphured air. What could I learn from such a dark place, from such a dark character?

A clue from many years ago still haunted me; a baffling attraction to the evil and darkness in Sauron when I read the Lord of the Rings Trilogy in high school.

As a writer, I finally created a dark story about these feelings… and in the process found hidden places in myself, locked away by the vestiges of my Christian upbringing. I had old fears about “evil” and “the devil,” and a general fear of dark and chaotic energies. What if they take over? I sought to understand, looking through websites online. The answers I found were a complete surprise to me. Magic is real. Occult is real. I am becoming a Draconian mage on the Left Hand Path.

My story is finished. It became an explicit, m/m slash fanfic about Sauron and Aragorn called A Love Made From Evil: Aragorn and Sauron of Middle-Earth.

Aragorn submits to Sauron, who changes him with evil. Can Aragorn make it back to the overworld?

It wasn’t easy to write about escalating evil. As I wrote about being changed by evil, I wondered: will I make it back to the overworld after opening and writing from these dark places in myself?

I found the darkest darkness, the void, in myself. I had to wrestle with myself not to turn away.

What did I learn from summoning that place, and breathing life into those characters? I learned how to get there, how to be changed by the darkness, and how to integrate rejected parts of myself. I pushed past inner barriers. I restored denied parts of my psyche. I reclaimed what was beyond the old walls and caverns of exile created by social repression.

I did not turn away from the void in myself. Instead I set out to find those who knew what it was, and what it meant.

The first website I pulled up was the Temple of the Ascending Flame, where I have completed the initial Ascending Flame Project qualifying workings, and I am now most of the way through the eleven week pre-initiate, Introductory Course.

I am called as a Draconian Mage on the Left Hand Path.

I was asleep. Now I am becoming free.

Mordor art by Slobodan Buncic on ArtStation


Twilight in the Underworld

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