I can frame it thus: it is not enough.
It is not enough to know my true nature: a being much greater than this.
It is not enough to know the true nature of this, the universe: truly the multiverse.
It is not enough to know that I will not reach a full attainment… this, or that…, but rather: my ascent and evolution will go on forever.
I can also frame it as this: I see my next step in my evolution, my ascent. Again, it is something completely new, something unforeseen (see above). I will not rest on my laurels, savoring what has been gained.
I make the quarter turn back to the energetic wild winds of change, flowing, billowing, the current slipping through me like soul breath through silk.
And now… I do not look only to the others, the entities that teach and support me, that lift me up as I wake up, and ascend.
THIS IS THE NEXT STEP.
Now, I see it. I now take an active role in moving forward, upward. Where do I want to go, manifest? What do I want to be, become?
And, noticing… What is in the way?
FEAR.
Fear that I will find out that none of this is real. That I will fall through it like so much smoke.
This would be devastating. And I fear it. A very old fear, that life is meaningless. (And so very, very long as to be an eternity to a child).
I can start with the fear. I can do ritual about the fear. I haven’t been doing ritual. A very simple ritual. Write it down and burn it. Offer it. Meditate on it. Journal about it. Watch. Journal some more. Whatever it takes to get past it.
Push through the FEAR like so much smoke.
Wake up. Wake up. Do not go back to sleep. The time to evolve is NOW.
A Thelemic frame: What is my true will? What is my path, the track of my personal, solitary orbit through the immensity of magkical space… as a star, the magickal star that I am?
Twilight in the Underworld 
Leave a Reply